Victim or Advocate? – Experiencing Evil’s Attacks is a Pre-requisite to Helping Victims

Mat 10:16-22  “Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.  (17)  Beware of men, for they will deliver you over to courts and flog you in their synagogues,  (18)  and you will be dragged before governors and kings for my sake, to bear witness before them and the Gentiles.  (19)  When they deliver you over, do not be anxious how you are to speak or what you are to say, for what you are to say will be given to you in that hour.

(20)  For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.  (21)  Brother will deliver brother over to death, and the father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death,  (22)  and you will be hated by all for my name’s sake. But the one who endures to the end will be saved.

In this ministry at Unholy Charade and Light for Dark Times, we often come across people who identify themselves as “advocates for victims of abuse.” Now that is a very good thing – to be an advocate, to be one who speaks for victims. But with a fair degree of regularity we hear from such people and are left to wonder – do they really grasp this evil? Have they personally experienced it?  In people who have not been the targets of this wickedness, or who are still oblivious to what it really is, there remains a blindness. A lack of experiential, Spirit-given wisdom about it. And as a result, they really are not qualified to be an advocate for abuse victims. At some point they will fail those they claim they want to help. They will give false counsel and they will excuse the abuser.

A friend of mine wrote to me recently about this. She said:

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine and we were talking about a pastor who didn’t “get” domestic abuse because he hasn’t experienced the evil of an abusive person. My friend said ‘If he is a true pastor he has experienced evil and abusive people. It goes with the job.’

True pastors (and true Christians) will experience evil and abusive people. It goes with the territory. If a pastor can’t wrap his brain around the idea of evil and how evil operates, well then one must question whether he is a pastor at all.

Every true Christian is hated by the world. Darkness hates the light of Christ that is present in us. But only when we realize what these attacks are, what motivates them, what their source is, do we become wise as serpents in regard to the serpent’s methods and tactics. This is really another test of whether we truly know Christ or not. People who remain willfully blind to the existence and strategies of evil, who refuse to recognize it especially as it shows up in the church….well, such people must not have assurance that they know the Lord at all.


6 thoughts on “Victim or Advocate? – Experiencing Evil’s Attacks is a Pre-requisite to Helping Victims

  1. Brilliant insight!

    I think an area where a lot of people are blind is how abusive women can be. Female abusers are in pews, in the choir, running children’s and women’s ministries and, sadly, even married to the pastor(s). They hide in plain sight and are able to abuse entire congregations and communities for years or even decades.

  2. “Experiencing evil’s attacks is a prerequisite to helping victims.” My experience validates the truth of this statement. For many years (30+) I counseled and discussed with many professionals and friends concerning the abusive behavior I was living under. Only those who had similar experiences offered any help or hope. Sadly most did not profess to be Christians. Today I find myself placed in conversations with men and woman who are being or recently separated themselves from those who habitually abuses them. These become deep and meaningful conversations helping shed light upon these acts of evil andoffering freedom to the abused. As destructive 30 years of living under evil’s abuse I’m taken back by how what was meant for evil God redeems into good.

  3. Amen, Pastor Crippen!!! I would give this post a thousand likes if that were possible. Thank you for posting this very true observation.

    “Experiencing Evil’s Attacks is a Pre-requisite to Helping Victims” should absolutely be one of the requirements necessary when someone is counseling abuse victims or survivors. It is the only way a person can truly understand and have the compassion needed to help the Lord’s wounded sheep. It is not something anyone can learn from a book, conference, seminar, or in any other way than experiencing the pain and trauma first-hand.

  4. So true about evil women in the church. A Christian school teacher and her husband were flying monkeys in union with the youth group leader that was abusing me.

    They joined together in their hatred for me. It was a thing —they would gather against me and delight in the smear campaign. Accusing me-hating me. All three are bullies. And all three are not Christians.

    All three held leadership positions in church related organizations. All three wore a mask of piety. All three still pose as imminent saints.

    All three are Not saved, are unrepentant And they will not be in heaven with me. In heaven there are no abusers or bullies. They won’t be there.

  5. YES! I cannot agree more that unless you have had the up-close, personal experience of being the target of evil & wounded by evil, then you simply won’t, don’t or can’t really “get it”. It’s a specific kind of wound with the brokenness mostly internal. Verbal Violence is every bit as destructive too.

    Add knowledge about the personality/character disordered abusers, which employ the same tactics and goal as the demonic (steal, kill, destroy – dominate, intimidate, manipulate) then an effective advocate and friend is created. Being seen, heard, validated and deeply understood is truly a healing balm. Have God in the center of it all, well… Holy Spirit is the discerner; Jesus the healer/redeemer;

    Father God’s will satisfied. God is Love and Love is the source, goal and answer.

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